SAN ANTONIO -

This week show is split into two one-hour episodes. No elimination this week, just dance, dance and more dance! Monday, four couples will do their “guilty pleasure” dance and we’ll see one of the team dances.

COUPLE: Kelly & Val
DANCE: Samba

This dance is to Cher Lloyd’s “Want U Back.” Seriously, these two are a couple. You can’t convince me this is just for TV. Kelly cried because she wasn’t getting it. I was worried this dance was only going to be Kelly dancing on Val’s lap. Then, they got off the chair and started moving. That’s when this dance really picked up! There should be no complaints from the judges about the hip action. It was hiptastic!

Len said it took too long to get started. He said he liked some of the elements, but there was too much gyration. He said it was a tad on the raunchy side. Bruno said Kelly is a titillating tasty tease. He said the only thing for him was the bounce. Then, he stood up to show Kelly his bounce. Carrie Ann said Kelly was uncertain. She said Kelly’s upper body was tense, her lower body was working it. She said Kelly’s footing was off.

SCORE: 24.5

COUPLE: Gilles & Peta
DANCE: Rumba

This dance is to Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You.” Now, I love me some Gilles, but I felt like this dance was all over the place. It felt rushed at times. Then, Gilles would extend himself in some of the moves and it was incredible. Maybe the song is making me unhappy. I did like this, but I wanted more. MORE! If I had a paddle, I’d still give Gilles a 9.

Bruno said that was not a dance, it was master class theater. He said Gilles maintained musicality when there was no music. Carrie Ann said, “Let the baby making begin!” Then, she fell off her chair. REALLY, Y’ALL! Gilles rushed over to help her up. Bruno collapsed on the desk and Gilles gave him a kiss. Tom said, “When you said, ‘Let the baby making begin,’ I didn’t think you’d get into position.” Carrie Ann said it was poetry in motion. Len said Gilles turned October into Hotober. He said Peta lifted her leg up a lot. 

SCORE: 29.5 (Len gave it a 9.5)

COUPLE: Kirstie & Maks
DANCE: Quick Step

This dance is to Simon & Garfunkel’s “Mrs. Robinson.” Kirstie broke down and cried. She said she wants to do better than she’s doing. Kirstie was counting at the beginning. I think she was singing through the rest of it. Her super long dress made it hard for me to see her feet sometimes. I think Kirstie figured this dance out – mostly. It wasn’t the fastest quick step, but it moved.

Carrie Ann said it was Kirstie’s best dance. She said there was a little boo boo. Len thought it was Kirstie’s best dance. Bruno said Kirstie delivered. He said there was little misstep, but nothing to worry about.

SCORE: 25.5

COUPLE: Emmitt & Cheryl
DANCE: Samba

This dance is to Barry Manilow’s “Copacabana.” Holy toucans! I’m talking about the giant birds on the stage – not Emmitt’s arms or Cheryl’s barely-there costume. There was nothing bad about this! It was fun and flawless! I want to see it again!

Len said it was well done! Bruno said Emmitt delivered maximum pleasure. He said Emmitt made the samba look easy. Carrie Ann said no one does samba like Emmitt. She said he has the samba swagger.

SCORE: 29 (Bruno gave them a 10)

TEAM “CALL ME MAYBE” 

Melissa suffered a herniated disc in her upper neck during rehearsals. She wasn’t the only one hurt. Shawn fell a few times – even smacked her face. I’m scared to watch this dance! Head bobs at the beginning were off. If that’s the worst of it, this won’t be bad at all! What the crazy flips is happening! Sabrina & Louis did their solo first. It included a really good flip. Shawn & Derek were next. It fit their cheerleader/football player theme. They did a move where the girls spun around. Melissa & Tony danced together next. It had more ballroom elements. Louis almost dropped Melissa’s foot before Apolo jumped over/under her. Apolo & Karina brought more freestyle to their solo. Their ending included some gymnastics. This was fun to watch – I just wish I wasn’t going to bed with “Call Me Maybe” in my head!

Len said it was quality. He thought the individual performances were fantastic. Bruno said the choreography was almost impossible to distinguish the celebrities and the dancers. Carrie Ann gave them a cheer. She said it was fantastic.

SCORE: 29.5 (Carrie Ann gave them a 9.5)

Tuesday, the rest of the all-stars perform their guilty pleasure dances and tonight’s couples will perform their team dance.