Pediatrician on how to talk to your kids about racial tension, racism

Dr. Lulu, of San Antonio’s Youth Health Center, shares steps to take to bring awareness to children

SAN ANTONIO – With protests that have been happening all over the country and internationally, parents have been wondering what is the best way to talk to their kids about racism.

Dr. Uchenna L. Umeh, or “Dr. Lulu” as she likes to be called, is an author and pediatrician at San Antonio’s Youth Health Center. She suggests for young children who have lots of questions, start by getting comfortable with having an uncomfortable conversation with your kids.

“Kids will ask the darndest things,” Umeh said. “Educate yourself. Know every single thing you need to know about racism.”

Related: How to talk to your children about protests and racism

Umeh suggests parents use the words “we” to relate your children to people who look like you and “they” for people who might seem a bit different.

“Put names to them, put faces to them, show them pictures,” Umeh said. “Say Emmett Till. Say the name Ahmaud Arbery. Say George Floyd. Put a name to it, put a face to it.”

If a child is a younger child, Umeh advises to use words like “mean.” If the child is 11 years old, come out and call it racism.

“Find out what they are already talking about, and then build up on that,” said Umeh.

For black families, Umeh said a lot of them in the US are already having this conversation, telling kids how to act and how to behave. She said in her own family, she stopped doing that.

“I don’t want my children to also live in fear for something they cannot really help,” said Umeh. “Be available to teach and educate other people.”

She mentioned the three Es: empathy, education and effort on the parts of both sides so people can all see eye to eye.

Related: How to watch ‘Sesame Street’ town hall addressing racism

As for what families can do to get involved and help their community, Umeh said to start supporting black-owned businesses and entrepreneurs.

Umeh has a new book coming out called What If My Child Is a Bully. She said racism is a form of bullying and it starts at home, which is why parents should learn to stop it when it begins.

“It’s coming from a place of low self-esteem and insecurities,” Umeh said. “It starts at home.”

To learn more about Dr. Lulu, visit her website.

Related: Parents, educators, experts talk to kids about race amid unrest


About the Authors

Diana Winters is a San Antonio-area native, Emmy award-winning and GLAAD-nominated journalist who loves the Alamo City. She is the executive producer of SA Live, creator of South Texas PRIDE and co-creator of Texas Eats.

Robert started his career at KSAT more than 10 years ago. He started as a prompter operator, to director, to promotions producer and now SA Live producer. He loved the excitement of news but entertainment is where he feels at home.

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